What Really Matters - Priorities

photo courtesy of Peter Reed on Flickr

What really matters in this life? When you get to the end of yours, what will you say you wish you had done more of? Had more of?

The answer to this question is different for each of us. Many people go through their whole lives never thinking about it. We are scared of death and so we avoid thinking about our lives ending until in some cases it’s too late. 

Sometimes I’m accused of being pessimistic because I ask this question of myself and those that I care about. I don’t see it as pessimistic. I see it as realistic. Tomorrow is not guaranteed and at some point we will die. There is no alternative. No one gets out alive. As David Wong says in John Dies at the End, “You're gonna die, Arnie. Someday you will face that moment. And at that moment you will face either complete nonexistence, or you will face something even stranger. On an actual day in the future, Arnie, you will be in the unimaginable. It is physically impossible to avoid it.” Some of us will have experiences that bring this fact crashing through the walls of our reality like a deranged Kool-Aid man and we’ll have no choice. But why should we wait for something like that to happen. If it’s that certain, then it only makes sense to on some level consider it. I’m not saying we should dwell on our inevitable fate, but some thought is worth it. 

Our society has an answer all ready for us to the question of what is important. Money. Power. Fame. Stuff. The Capitalistic way of life is built firmly on the foundation of insatiable need for stuff. We need better cars, bigger houses, more money. We believe having these things will make our lives more comfortable; more secure. We think we can shield ourselves from the harsher side of life. And maybe on some level we can. But all the money, power, and fame in the World does not guarantee that we won’t get hit by a bus tomorrow or live beyond the end of this year. So how much does that new car really matter? How much of your precious time on this Earth are you going to devote to having more than you really need?

Now before I or anyone else starts to get the wrong impression about what I’m saying here, I am not advocating that we all quit our jobs. Remember, that the Buddha preached the Middle Way between extremes. Have money, but don’t be greedy. Have stuff, but not too much. Above all, really consider what matters to you and make time for it.

For me, I find that I want to spend more time with my family, more time with my teacher, and more time on my practice. Does another hour of video games really matter? Probably not. Am I still going to play them? Yes, but not to the detriment of everything else. And keeping my priorities straight is an ongoing task. Just like a ship, I can set my course in the direction I want, but I still need to check in from time to time and make sure the bow is pointed in the right direction. Are you charting the course you really want or letting outside forces blow you around?

Gassho,

Daishin

Toilet Zen

Photo courtesy of  Jan Ubels on Flickr

It seems that we spend a lot of time as a species separating things into the categories of Good and Bad. We look at the world around us and immediately begin to move things into one bucket or another like a frantic toddler trying to get a piece of candy for picking up their Legos. Sometimes we go even farther and label some items as evil or impure or profane. The problem with this is that when we do this sort of sorting, good/bad right/wrong yes/no, we create a dualistic separation between ourselves and the rest of the Universe. In a lot of ways, this dualistic view is the cause of so much of the suffering in the world.

Zen is about living our lives in this World. Seeing things as they are. Without attaching labels to everything and creating separation where none exists. We tend to get ourselves very confused on this point by thinking that certain things are part of our practice and other things are not. But isn’t everything that we do a part of our Life. If Zen is about living, then what can possibly be outside of our practice? This is an idea that has echoed down through the ages with some of the most prominent masters going to great lengths to expound the virtues of the most mundane activities. Dogen even went so far as to write an entire fascicle in the Shobogenzo called Senjo on how to use the toilet in a monastery. In it, he demonstrates that every activity is an opportunity for practice and that to view somethings as vile and unworthy is a mistake. I think Brad Warner said it best when he said that if you can’t bow down before the putrefying roadkill on the side of the highway then you have no business worshiping leather bound tomes and statues made of gold and silver. It is in that spirit and with the teachings of Dogen Zenji in mind that I present my take on using the toilet as a form of practice. Hopefully Dogen approves of the update.

The bathroom is the most necessary room in any home, temple, or other building. It is used the most often by the most number of people and when it is needed can not be substituted for any other room. It is for this reason that we should treat using the restroom as nothing other than the practice of Zen. Each time we take time to satisfy our body’s need to remove waste, we are offered an opportunity to practice and show gratitude. By using the toilet, we are demonstrating compassion toward ourselves and thereby showing kindness to all living beings.

When you need to use the restroom, proceed directly there as soon as you realize you need to go. Do not wait until you have to go so badly that you might have an accident or need to rush.

If the door to the toilet is closed, knock three times and wait for a response. If someone is using the restroom, take this time as an opportunity to practice standing zazen. Wait patiently and do not become agitated. If you do not wait too long to go to the bathroom, this should not be an issue. If there is no answer to your knocks, open the door, bow before entering, enter, and close the door behind you.

If you are wearing an Okesa or Rakusu, hang them on the hooks provided outside of the restroom. Do not take your sacred vestments into the toilet. While the waste coming out of you is none other than the Buddha’s face, it is still bad form to let your robes get dirty.

Once in the bathroom, bow to the toilet with hands in gassho. Remember, it is because the toilet does it’s job and does it well that you are able to free yourself of your waste with little effort. Anyone who has ever had a toilet not do its job properly can attest to how important it is. We should be grateful for its continued efforts.

If you are standing to use the toilet, be sure to lift both the lid and the seat. It is also very important to maintain your focus so as not to soil the outside of the toilet. If you do happen to get some waste in any other place than in the toilet, use toilet paper to clean the area so that it is clean and ready for the next person. Do not force others to deal with your waste because of your laziness and inattention.

Do not take reading material, cell phones, or other entertainment items to use the toilet. This is not a time to relax, but is instead a time to focus on tending to the needs of your body. Focus on what needs to be done and do it in an expedient manner, but also do not rush. Take the time that needs to be taken and no more. Remember, while you are in the restroom, others may be waiting.

Once you are done eliminating your waste, use toilet paper to clean yourself thoroughly. Use only enough paper to become clean and do not be wasteful. Remember, living beings gave up their lives so that you can be clean and free from waste. Honor this by using only what you need and nothing more.

After cleaning, flush the toilet and lower the lid and seat if necessary. As you flush, be grateful for the opportunity to free yourself of your waste and take care of your body. Bow with hands in gassho. You may choose to recite a short gatha. An example might be:

“As I flush away my waste, may I be reminded to flush away my delusions and attachments in the waters of the dharma.”

Wash your hands thoroughly with soap and water. Regardless of how or why you went to the bathroom, it is important to clean your hands so as not to spread any germs to others.

If the bathroom has an unpleasant smell, use a bathroom spray to restore the freshness to the room so that the next person will not have to endure the smell.

Upon exiting the restroom, bow to the room as you leave thanking it for being there and for helping you. Put on your robes and return to whatever it was you were doing remembering that to take time out to use the restroom is an important part of living and thus an important part of Zen.

Gassho,

Daishin